How not to deal with a bad breakup....

my shrink just told me about the hole theory....


apparently, when you've got yourself deep in a dark, ugly, cold, bitter hole, and you want to get out.... well, according to him and all of his medical knowledge, you aren't supposed to keep digging...


but say you decide to stay in that hole, it's familiar.... maybe you feel it's what you deserve right now?


here's a little advice sure to keep you deep in that hole and most likely take you to depths you never even knew existed....




badmouth the hell out of that person..... he dumped you -he deserves it!

continue checking all accounts if you have the passwords, email, facebook, whatever.... if you don't have the password, just continue to check updates on any public accounts. Check their friends accounts as well, incase they posted something that might clue you in on what your ex is up to...


continue to call, email, text, post facebook comments, whatever


get really fucked up every night.... to the point where you don't even remember the humiliating actions of the night before!


eat eat and eat some more! Eat away all of those icky feelings! Because, if you didn't feel fat and unattractive when you were dumped, now's your chance.... and trust me those feelings will continue to stick with you, just like that cottage cheese cellulite that will faithfully hug your ass every single day.... now that's something to look forward to!


alienate your friends and family! they don't understand what you are going through anyways, you're pissed and he won't talk to you.... who else are you going to take all that anger and rage out on? while you are blowing off that steam, why not blame them for your relationship not working it out.... I mean it didn't work out, I'm sure you can think of some way they weren't totally supportive of your relationship....


wear your feelings of utter worthlessness and despair on your sleeve... tell everyone about it.... post it on your facebook and any other highly visible place you can think of... if you are still on myspace you can do it there, then you can pick a really depressing song for your background music!


If you can get yourself to go on any dates make sure to tell your date in depth about how you are constantly doing all of the above mentioned activities...


then when he doesn't call, you can add that to your affirmations of low self worth and utter repulsiveness


good luck

!.... besides, being classy and moving on with your life.... well, that's just a lot harder then all of those so called experts like to make it sound....